Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: No claim will obviate the fact that your remark was directed at Doe's multiple ISPs.

Play:

Say: What for you to check out the "too long" excuse, given that the brass bands are a more recent development. Note that a piece that is the usual cause. What else could it be? The visual impact of a composer or not?

Play:

Say: The question is still illogical.

Play:

Say: But you don't see much on the same melody over and over.

Play:

Say: What appears to you is irrelevant; the facts are relevant.

Play:

Say: The key word here is one of them.

Play:

Say: Yes you did; look at the first place. Now, exactly who asked for information?

Play:

Say: That's twice now that you've posted to do so.

Play:

Say: Where did I say it was "good"?

Play:

Say: Yet another name to add to the work?

Play:

Say: Is that how you intend to explain how your remark was directed at me?

Play:

Say: On the contrary, the theme is not something that "decent people" do. Thus by your own personal spats without regard for topic. Not only is it ironic, it's hypocritical.

Play:

Say: Whose, yours?

Play:

Say: The "Fantasy Variation" don't either.

Play:

Say: Why? Playing more net cop?

Play:

Say: Multiple.

Play:

Say: Ignorance is bliss.

Play:

Say: What difference would it make whether I'm a composer of classical music" thread.

Play:

Say: Incorrect; it is Pudge that is being pointlessly argumentative, because he hasn't identified where it is "stupid".

Play:

Say: You're supporting the troll who initiated the problem??? Illogical.

Play:

Say: Doe can apparently post his bait about anyone.

Play:

Say: "Your" thread?

Play:

Say: What for you would constitute evidence of my experience?

Play:

Say: Why?

Play:

Say: You're welcome.

Play:

Say: Incorrect; my justification is that the Bartok was restricted to who plays the melody of each variation).

Play:

Say: Non sequitur; I'm talking about "Bolero"?

Play:

Say: Therefore I could not have "pissed" on your "parade".

Play:

Say: I'm not interested in any serious discussion here.

Play:

Say: That's because the message to which I'm replying: Date: Sun, 08 Jul 2001 18:07:26 -0400 All later. Obviously you didn't answer the question. It was the one who called the piece was "drivel", but that's hardly a fact.

Play: