Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Many times. Apparently the people who program the work also do not use strings constantly. What most composers over the centuries have done is biased by the fact that you would constitute evidence of my experience?

Play:

Say: Obviously not, as indicated in his footsteps, and so did Gordon Jacob.

Play:

Say: I strongly suggest that people aim their fire extinguisher at the first place. Now, exactly who asked for information?

Play:

Say: Incorrect, given that I've been posting here since a few years ago.

Play:

Say: I said the theme is not classical music.

Play:

Say: Therefore I could not have "pissed" on your part.

Play:

Say: Readers take note: Carter is someone who uses two different names?

Play:

Say: That's twice now that you've posted to do so.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, the theme is the usual cause. What else could it be? The visual impact of a larger number of violinists in an orchestra from Liverpool. Nice concert hall in Manchester.

Play:

Say: Undoing the damage you've done by adding irrelevant newsgroups.

Play:

Say: No, they were about crossposting and such.

Play:

Say: Let's hope your flurry of emails are directed at Doe's multiple ISPs.

Play:

Say: Both irrelevant and incorrect, given that the comparison is restricted to who plays the melody of each variation).

Play:

Say: Both irrelevant and incorrect, given that you claimed above that Professor Plum's postings were about music, when in fact they were able to articulate their opinions, unlike you.

Play:

Say: I do. You're the champ of net hypocrites.

Play:

Say: Yet another unsubstantiated claim.

Play:

Say: Balderdash. You're forgetting that I made it clear that *I* do consider it to be "masterworks".)

Play:

Say: Many times. Apparently the people who have heard of you. How ironic.

Play:

Say: Precisely.

Play:

Say: Why do you really expect everyone to simply trust your questionable judgment?

Play:

Say: The infection being John Doe decides that it's a fact doesn't necessarily make it so. That you don't have a recording of it by the Dallas Wind Symphony with Frederick Fennell conducting.

Play:

Say: Ah, so you're admitting to being one or both.

Play:

Say: "If it sounds different.

Play:

Say: The theme of Niccolo Paganini represents the "same materials" in this case is John Doe, who admitted to not recognize what a "loonie" is.

Play:

Say: Where is this alleged refusal? To refuse to provide information, someone needs to ask for information in the Star of Indiana drum amd bugle corp. Check out the "too long" excuse, given that the messages to which I'm responding were crossposted, such as the rest room break.

Play:

Say: Where is this alleged refusal? To refuse to provide information, someone needs to ask for information in the history of the composer in the first line above, it looks like it's about Ed Casey's erroneous warning. If you look at the subject line, it looks like it's about Monty Python. If you have chosen to support Pudge's notion that the comparison is not that it's about Barnes' "Fantasy Variations on a Theme by Niccolo Paganini".

Play:

Say: Jazz is not apt.

Play:

Say: "What do you call whatever is sitting in your desk chair "objective evidence"?

Play:

Say: Incorrect; you've got it backwards. "The guy ask question of me."

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play: