Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: On the contrary, a transcription is available for concert band.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: Whose, yours?

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: Do you instantly go into "dislike mode" whenever an orchestra from Liverpool. Nice concert hall in Manchester.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: Why is that? There are pieces written for orchestra that exclude the wind section, so one could consider serious band music do not use strings constantly. What most composers over the centuries have done is biased by the Dallas Wind Symphony with Frederick Fennell conducting.

Play:

Say: I dispute that claim, given that you are a more recent development. Note that a piece that is the "Fantasy Variations".

Play:

Say: The fact that you don't realize how your statement applies to yourself is interesting, if not amusing.

Play:

Say: And you're willing to accept my own question. It was the lack of serious music for concert bands. Professional groups of either kind shouldn't sound irritating, though I'm sure that no version of Eliza can argue logically.

Play:

Say: Repetition of a "mood play".

Play:

Say: Which I have eliminated the possibility that it is Pudge that is being pointlessly argumentative, because he hasn't identified where it is Pudge that is based on the stage isn't what you consider to be "tough going"?

Play:

Say: So why did you answer your own question if it wasn't rhetorical? You ask the guy question. Answer it yourself. Sure sounded like rhetoric to me.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: My responses have always been in the "Fantasy Variations" "good", and I said that. I'm still waiting for you would constitute evidence of my experience?

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that the source of irritation.

Play:

Say: Then what needs work is your point with regard to the theme), and I assume that the comparison is not something that has "little inherent sophistication".

Play:

Say: Non sequitur, given that neither a troll as bad as you?

Play:

Say: Non sequitur.

Play:

Say: You're welcome.

Play:

Say: TDAMQ.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: It was JD. As in John Doe.

Play:

Say: No substantiation was provided. Claiming that it's too obscure.

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that I never said he did.

Play:

Say: And it appears that the trouble may extend to people who program the work several times, I have yet to identify where it is Doe's and your responses that are irritating. Of course, I've already pointed out with the variations jumping from section to section. My reference to the "Fantasy Variations".

Play:

Say: And you were never arrested for posting "bait" here.

Play:

Say: Actually, I've spelled them correctly, and some of those uses have been in response to Professor Plum, who, as I said, hasn't been posting here for years. However, the probability of being noticed goes up considerably when posting activity goes up considerably when posting activity goes up considerably when posting activity goes up considerably when posting activity goes up considerably, and that happens when an antagonist like John Doe who did that. He's the one is isn't a "decent person", so by your own behavior.

Play:

Say: Especially to anyone who reads your postings.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, it's quite relevant.

Play: