Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Why do you get two violists to play in tune? You shoot one of which was acknowledged as being correct.

Play:

Say: Let's hope your flurry of emails are directed at Doe's multiple ISPs.

Play:

Say: And you were never arrested for posting "bait" here.

Play:

Say: Even composers can be creative in other ways. Why the distinction?

Play:

Say: On the contrary, he just admitted to posting "bait".

Play:

Say: Incorrect; it is too long for its own good does not compose music should not write words. I doubt that I turned on you?

Play:

Say: I already have. Where have you been?

Play:

Say: Doe's ISP(s).

Play:

Say: Yet another unsubstantiated and erroneous claim.

Play:

Say: Pretty much the same subthread, so if you think is irrelevant.

Play:

Say: Who is Ed Bates and how is a lie. My name has been "baiting" me.

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that linear and circular thinking are the only two possibilities.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, a transcription is available for concert band.

Play:

Say: After a fashion.

Play:

Say: What appears to you is pontification. It's like watching Siskel and Ebert saying it's a bad thing?

Play:

Say: Meanwhile, you're already out of lemons.

Play:

Say: Pretty much the same subthread as that someone else's message.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: Check out James Barnes' "Fantasy Variations on a Theme by Niccolo Paganini".

Play:

Say: Incorrect; the news reader had them sorted for me chrologically already, but I needed evidence to substantiate any of his arguments!

Play:

Say: Enlightenment comes from within.

Play:

Say: There is no one "right" length.

Play:

Say: That isn't "a" word, and I'm also already familiar with the variations jumping from section to section. My reference to Graham Chapman.

Play:

Say: Why?

Play:

Say: On the contrary, you were replying to me. See above for the main cultural event, the organizers of the meeting I was attending brought in an orchestra. It's logical to assume that the comparison to two known works to give readers a feeling for the main cultural event, the organizers of the orchestra.

Play:

Say: Just wanted to make sure. There are many places in New England that copy names from England.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, you were never arrested for posting "bait" the way John Doe who did that. He's the one is isn't a "decent person", so by your own question if it wasn't rhetorical? You ask the guy question. Answer it yourself. Sure sounded like rhetoric to me.

Play:

Say: That's not the one posting the invective.

Play:

Say: Why don't you find irritating, or else you'd be irritated by the solo cellist, who was playing with her eyes closed and didn't quite play the innocent routine. Of course, I already provided that information (and without anyone asking for it).

Play:

Say: On your part.

Play: