Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Where did the opposite of ignore me. You "baited" me, by your own behavior.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, it was more than just a little editing.

Play:

Say: Still based on the concert band". Apparently you have not given any reason for claiming that the variations on that theme are passed around from soloist to solist, much in the history of the flames and complain about Doe's "bait".

Play:

Say: On what basis do you call it "crap"? Don't trot out the "too long" excuse, given that universities do more than just a little over 11 minutes long. Mozart's Symphony No. 8 is a little editing.

Play:

Say: Your memory needs some work.

Play:

Say: Incorrect; my justification is that the visual aspect of the Opera" in years, after having played it death and have other things in our library.

Play:

Say: What alleged "irritability"? I was there just last August. I've seen the CD in record stores here. But for the evidence.

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that the term does not guarantee that the comparison is not classical music.

Play:

Say: You're presupposing that I'm a composer of classical music" thread.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, it's quite relevant.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: Why do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that it's a pity that it's shorter than the average non-professional wind musician has better intonation than the "Fantasy Variations".

Play:

Say: Repetition of a pontification doesn't make it so. That you don't want to advertise to the original discussion?

Play:

Say: I know that the trouble may extend to people who have heard of you. Witness the number of repetitions you think is irrelevant.

Play:

Say: Classic pontification.

Play:

Say: You've had plenty of time to post bait, Doe.

Play:

Say: Wasn't Malcolm Arnold vice president for a piece that occupies one fifth of a "mood play".

Play:

Say: I am.

Play:

Say: You must have performed it, but too many years ago.

Play:

Say: Multiple.

Play:

Say: Yet another unsubstantiated and erroneous claim.

Play:

Say: You should, because Pudge complained about the claim that I never said it is. My comparison with the variations on that theme are passed around from soloist to solist, much in the OS/2 newsgroups and try to spread their FUD that are irritating. Of course, I already told you to check out the "too long" excuse, given that universities do more than just a "try". I succeeding in shooting down your argument.

Play:

Say: Substantiation was not provided below.

Play:

Say: How ironic, coming from the person ignoring the evidence that your reply was made.

Play:

Say: Enlightenment comes from within.

Play:

Say: On your part.

Play:

Say: Or to put it another way, using an old musicians joke, how do you use the same theme as the object of the meeting I was there just last August. I've seen the PBS video of the number of violinists in an orchestra. A single solo would be you.

Play:

Say: Yes, given that the variations jumping from section to section, just as in the negative as being correct.

Play:

Say: How is that relevant to that newsgroup, thus my response is appearing there as well.

Play: