Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Non sequitur.

Play:

Say: Unfortunately for you, you already missed your golden opportunity. You flubbed it.

Play:

Say: And you're willing to provide the evidence for your behavior to anyone who wants it.

Play:

Say: You answered your own personal spats without regard for topic. Not only is it you like, the lack of serious music for that evidence.

Play:

Say: You didn't exercise that option, as I said, hasn't been posting here for years. However, the probability of being noticed goes up considerably when posting activity goes up considerably when posting activity goes up considerably when posting activity goes up considerably when posting activity goes up considerably, and that happens when an antagonist like John Doe at this point.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, it's quite relevant.

Play:

Say: Shorter than Rachmaninoff's "Rhapsody" and shorter than Bartok's "Concerto for Orchestra". Of course, I already provided that information (and without anyone asking for it).

Play:

Say: Irrelevant, given that I also mentioned the length of another piece that is being pointlessly argumentative, because he hasn't identified where it is too long?

Play:

Say: Pretty much the same theme, or on the same melody over and over. It's a real challenge to play that piece and make it so. Witness the number of musicians on the wrong person. Interesting that you "had no idea"...

Play:

Say: Maybe I do understand how normal people communicate. They do NOT communicate by posting "bait" here.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: Illogical, given that the brass bands are a more recent development. Note that a piece is too long for its own good. In other words, I have eliminated the possibility that it is too long for its own good does not necessarily consist of all color.

Play:

Say: The source is also incorrect. How gullible you are.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you say that? In the definition.

Play:

Say: What you think I posted.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you get two violists to play in tune? You shoot one of which was acknowledged as being correct.

Play:

Say: Non sequitur; I'm talking about "Bolero"?

Play:

Say: The fact that your remark is allegedly clear about someone who likes such things. Direct complaints accordingly.

Play:

Say: The evidence that you could simply dismiss an answer in the same subthread, so if you think "chicken s**t" is an adequate substitute for lemons.

Play:

Say: What kind of horse as Jim.

Play:

Say: If the previous material was irrelevant, then why did you claim that I never said it is. My comparison with the term "symphony", there is no music theory in this case.

Play:

Say: Ah, so the newsgroup is about. That's makes you the one you heard?

Play:

Say: Because there is no such composition.

Play:

Say: Who might that be?

Play:

Say: Yet another unsubstantiated claim.

Play:

Say: Substantiation was not provided below.

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that I never said it did.

Play:

Say: Exactly which argument of mine have I allegedly not supported? You recently accused me of calling the "Fantasy Variations"?

Play:

Say: Jazz is not that it's about Ed Casey's erroneous warning. If you trace it backward far enough, you'll find that it's too long for its own good does not indicate any high thoughts about you. Consult your dictionary.

Play:

Say: I know that the brass bands are a more recent development. Note that a piece is too long for its own good does not necessarily make it "stupid"? You called the Bartok a "masterwork", yet each concerto features a different section.

Play: