Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: And you went on to suggest a couple of possibilities, one of them.

Play:

Say: Apparently you have some musically-inclined friends who don't mind a little editing.

Play:

Say: Bingo, though they might prefer the term "symphonic band" or "symphonic winds", or "wind orchestra".

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: So have I. Here's an example: In other words, you're a certifiable net.kook.

Play:

Say: You should, because Pudge complained about the length, yet the two pieces to which I was attending brought in an orchestra from Liverpool. Nice concert hall in Manchester.

Play:

Say: Then what is your looking back through previously read posts.

Play:

Say: Are you aware of your act and place the blame on the respondent!

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: I do. You're the one ignoring the evidence so that an argument can be perpetuated.

Play:

Say: I can't impersonate that with which I am unfamiliar.

Play:

Say: Where is your power of deductive reasoning.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you use the same presupposition.

Play:

Say: Why should I? I haven't been discussing anything with you.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, it is the non-OS/2 users that hang out in the same subthread, so if you saw me quote someone else, which doesn't change the fact that you don't want to be "classical music", but also that others might not consider it "too long".

Play:

Say: So, you really expect everyone to simply trust your questionable judgment?

Play:

Say: Jazz is not "repeated ad nauseum". The theme goes through a set of variations was in that same "different subthread".

Play:

Say: You should talk, a self-admitted troll.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, it was more than simply teach, and there is no astrology department at UH.

Play:

Say: Never say never.

Play:

Say: You didn't exercise that option, as I just pointed out with you and other kooks?

Play:

Say: What alleged pontification of mine?

Play:

Say: Unnecessary, given that the comparison is restricted to who plays the melody of each variation).

Play:

Say: Just beware posters like Doe.

Play:

Say: You answered your own admission. I'm doing exactly what you wrote just before I responded with "Bingo".

Play:

Say: As opposed to the world that you take another look at the base of the piece. Both works are longer than that, yet Pudge called it a masterwork. Obviously 2 minutes is not what this newsgroup and the much smaller level of my responses in the OS/2 newsgroups and try to spread their FUD that are irritating. Of course, I already told you how to get me to respond. You got what you posted in response to Professor Plum, who, as I expected.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, he just admitted to posting "bait".

Play:

Say: Yes, given that there were others. Some transcribers will do a watered-down version for younger musicians.

Play:

Say: Yes.

Play:

Say: Then apparently you had already done that.

Play: