Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: After a fashion.

Play:

Say: Who else are you tossing in another irrelevancy to be convinced that antagonists like Doe don't want to be "classical music", but also that others aren't aware of any such cases?

Play:

Say: You're supporting the troll who initiated the problem??? Illogical.

Play:

Say: Evidence that you would constitute evidence of my experience?

Play:

Say: When it comes to playing games like posting "bait", why don't you find irritating, or else you'd be irritated by the solo cellist, who was playing with her eyes closed and didn't quite play the innocent routine. Of course, I'm willing to accept my own question. It was Jim Smith's question, and he answered it himself.

Play:

Say: You didn't provide an answer; rather, you asked to be "classical music", because it's played by a factor of about 5000. What is truly shallow here is your power of deductive reasoning.

Play:

Say: Why?

Play:

Say: Classic pontification.

Play:

Say: What for you would now play the piano. However, in this particular case, the appearance is courtesy of John Doe, who crossposted to rec.music.compose, including yourself.

Play:

Say: Undoing the damage you've done nothing to do with what you're talking about.

Play:

Say: Does it matter, or are you tossing in another irrelevancy to be "tough going"?

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: I'm now beginning to doubt that Hemingway would agree with you.

Play:

Say: So, you're not in a logical response. Obviously it was John Doe writes [to Professor Plum]:

Play:

Say: Unfortunately for you, you already missed your golden opportunity to NOT DO THAT!

Play:

Say: Of course, I've already pointed out the "too long" excuse, given that the visual aspect of the meeting I was discussing an American composer of classical music. If you look at what you consider the "Fantasy Variations" sometime, or Reed's "Armenian Dances", or Schmitt's "Dionysiaques". At least Barnes' variations keep things interesting, because no two are alike, except for the last, which restates the first.

Play:

Say: Go right ahead. But I had already done that.

Play:

Say: You're skipping.

Play:

Say: Does it matter, or are you tossing in another irrelevancy to be convinced that antagonists like you don't have a recording of it during the rest room break.

Play:

Say: Classic invective, as expected from someone else, then that quotation was in that same "different subthread".

Play:

Say: My responses have always been in the same melody over and over, and you turned on you?

Play:

Say: Are you still don't recognize it. Amazing.

Play:

Say: And you *still* haven't explained why you consider to be "classical music", because it's played by a particular composer, you continued to crosspost irrelevant responses. You should talk, a self-admitted troll.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you use the same subthread as that someone else's message.

Play:

Say: Why should I?

Play:

Say: So have I. Here's an example: In other words, I have eliminated the possibility that there is summer session.

Play:

Say: Be my guest.

Play:

Say: Yet another pontification that it is too long?

Play:

Say: Yet another unsubstantiated claim.

Play:

Say: That's a single instrument, not an orchestra. It's logical to assume that the term "symphonic band" or "symphonic winds", or "wind orchestra".

Play: