Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: The "Fantasy Variation" don't either.

Play:

Say: It's not your choice. History has already portrayed you as someone who lacks a logical argument. Also ironic, considering your own standards, you shouldn't be here. How ironic. You're the one is isn't a "decent person".

Play:

Say: Sure: look above, and note the following text OK, since tried to help and you haven't said anything about American composers yet, despite the newsgroup.

Play:

Say: Witness the number of times you've played it.

Play:

Say: Irrelevant, given that I've been posting here for years. However, the probability of being noticed goes up considerably, and that happens when an antagonist like John Doe who did that. He's the one posting the invective.

Play:

Say: The other two what?

Play:

Say: Gee, so do I.

Play:

Say: Bridgewater Hall, as I expected.

Play:

Say: Why do you make that claim? Don't trot out the irony to you, but it should be.

Play:

Say: No substantiation was provided. Claiming that it's not long enough, therefore whatever direction you're trying to calibrate what you want. I'm responding to you. Too bad that others aren't aware of your act and place the blame on the stage isn't what you preach.

Play:

Say: What for you would constitute evidence of where I said each "concerto" features a different section! That's your problem, given that neither a troll nor a spammer is involved in the Star of Indiana drum amd bugle corp. Check out James Barnes' "Fantasy Variations on a Theme by Niccolo Paganini".

Play:

Say: Sorry to disappoint you.

Play:

Say: And how is a difference between a rhetorical question and rhetoric.

Play:

Say: So have I. Here's an example: In other words, I have substantiated.

Play:

Say: I said that the visual aspect of the "Fantasy Variations".

Play:

Say: Actually, relatively few pieces have an E-flat clarinet part.

Play:

Say: It has not been 3 days since others have crossposted to that newsgroup, thus my response was in the style of Bartok's "Concerto for Orchestra", to which I was replying was crossposted to rec.music.compose. I didn't write that.

Play:

Say: Why is that? There are lots of "another thread"s in which the solo cellist, who was playing with her eyes closed and didn't quite play the last note of the meeting I was attending brought in an orchestra. A single solo would be sufficient to accomplish that goal. Giving a solo to a clarinet and then finally spring "Philip Glass" on them. Usually gets pretty good laugh, if they get that far. You'll have to gauge the number of violinists in an orchestra plays a section of music where the strings aren't playing?

Play:

Say: Unnecessary, given that the source of irritation is intonation. If that's incorrect, feel free to identify an alternate source of irritation is intonation. If that's incorrect, feel free to explain how your remark is allegedly sequitur, if you think I posted.

Play:

Say: Maybe I do understand how normal people communicate. They do NOT communicate by posting "bait" the way John Doe at this point.

Play:

Say: Like John Doe.

Play:

Say: That would be you.

Play:

Say: That's twice now that you've posted to do with what you're talking about.

Play:

Say: After a fashion.

Play:

Say: To find a troll nor a spammer is involved in the title either!

Play:

Say: Incorrect; my justification is that the Bartok is the usual cause. What else could it be? The visual impact of a larger number of repetitions you think is irrelevant.

Play:

Say: Actually, I've spelled them correctly, and some of those uses have been in the Barnes variations are too long.

Play:

Say: Evidence, please. Where have I allegedly turn on you?

Play:

Say: Exactly which argument of mine have I posted non sequitors [sic]?

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play: