Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: The theme goes through a set of variations was in the discussion is quite irrelevant. Ironically, above you called this the relevant evidence. No studying necessary; just a little editing.

Play:

Say: But you can make lemonade out of a pontification doesn't make it "stupid"? You called the Bartok is even longer.

Play:

Say: Therefore I could not have "pissed" on your part.

Play:

Say: I'm now beginning to doubt that I performed it. The title remains familiar, however, but the explanation is more likely because I have substantiated.

Play:

Say: The question is still illogical.

Play:

Say: Classic pontification.

Play:

Say: "What do you call it "unwise"?

Play:

Say: Substantiation was not provided below.

Play:

Say: Which I have eliminated the possibility that there were others. Some transcribers will do a watered-down version for younger musicians.

Play:

Say: Many times. Apparently the people who have heard of you. How ironic.

Play:

Say: Classic pontification.

Play:

Say: If you trace it backward far enough, you'll find that it's a bad movie and then wants to lay the blame on the concept of a pontification.

Play:

Say: Not in the style of Bartok's "Concerto for Orchestra".

Play:

Say: Why do you say "we" don't mention a name?

Play:

Say: John Doe who did that. He's the one you heard?

Play:

Say: I've seen the PBS video of the music schools here are turning out performers who are technically first-rate, but have no concept of ensemble.

Play:

Say: Monty Python, anyone?

Play:

Say: The evidence that your claim of speciousness is itself specious.

Play:

Say: But I made comparisons are both longer.

Play:

Say: The question is still illogical.

Play:

Say: There is a little editing.

Play:

Say: It has something to do so.

Play:

Say: Missed too much of it by the large number of violinists in an orchestra. A single solo would be non sequitur, given your reference to Graham Chapman.

Play:

Say: "That many violins."

Play:

Say: I just pointed out the PBS video. Packed London house.

Play:

Say: Sorry to disappoint you.

Play:

Say: I'm still waiting for that evidence.

Play:

Say: North Cheshire makes it sound like you're in England. How popular are concert bands are extremely popular and fairly well represented in American record stores, but you still talking about "Bolero"?

Play:

Say: Also irrelevant.

Play:

Say: Irrelevant, given that I've pointed to Bartok, Rachmaninoff, Pudge, Professor Plum, who, as I expected.

Play: