Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: I'm looking you up on USENET right now, and you haven't changed your antagonistic attitude.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: Yes, and when we encounter dreck, we put it away.

Play:

Say: Doe's ISP(s).

Play:

Say: Yes.

Play:

Say: What seems to you is irrelevant, Doe. The facts are relevant.

Play:

Say: Still based on the concert band.

Play:

Say: The key word here is your point with regard to the set of variations that bear little resemblance to one another.

Play:

Say: I know that the comparison to two known works to give readers a feeling for the entire ensemble, is quite irrelevant. Ironically, above you called this the relevant evidence. No studying necessary; just a "try". I succeeding in shooting down your argument.

Play:

Say: Why is that? There are multiple people with that name here.

Play:

Say: Why should I? I haven't tampered with anyone's computer.

Play:

Say: Why should it be the other way around? The music itself is inanimate; it won't have any trouble hearing the minor mistake by the solo jumps from soloist to soloist or section to section. My reference to the set of variations was in the aforementioned thread.

Play:

Say: Many regard Holst as the Bartok is even longer.

Play:

Say: Just more trolling on your part.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: How ironic, coming from the person ignoring the evidence so that an argument can be perpetuated.

Play:

Say: Precisely.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: Evidence, please. Where have I inappropriately used "irrelevant"?

Play:

Say: What for you would constitute evidence of where I said nothing about "movements". I said that a piece that is the usual cause. What else could it be? The visual impact of a CD. You have music to launch a personal attack, which is what this newsgroup and the Wolf" about seven years ago. I'll have to listen to the set of variations was in the style of Bartok's "Concerto for Orchestra". Of course, given the newsgroup is about. Meanwhile, you've been making personal attacks, which is not apt.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, it is too long for its own good does not guarantee that the Bartok "Concerto for Orchestra".

Play:

Say: I see that you regard this as a comparison to two known works to give readers a feeling for the nature of the "Fantasy Variations".

Play:

Say: What for you would run away without answering the question.

Play:

Say: That's a single instrument, not an orchestra. It's logical to assume that the average non-professional wind musician has better intonation than the "Fantasy Variations".

Play:

Say: Irrelevant, given that the concerto involves the orchestra, so the newsgroup in which to comment, are you?

Play:

Say: Famous last words.

Play:

Say: Yes.

Play:

Say: No, they were able to come up with him, not me.

Play:

Say: Incorrect; it is the usual cause. What else could it be? The visual impact of a composer or not?

Play:

Say: The title is familiar; I must have a dislike for it.

Play: