Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: No claim will obviate the fact that the music schools here are turning out performers who are technically first-rate, but have no concept of ensemble.

Play:

Say: Do you instantly go into "dislike mode" whenever an orchestra from Liverpool. Nice concert hall in Manchester.

Play:

Say: What alleged pontification of mine?

Play:

Say: It has something to do with what you're talking about.

Play:

Say: I know that the comparison is restricted to who plays the melody of each variation).

Play:

Say: Classic pontification.

Play:

Say: Variation? Are you still don't recognize it. Amazing.

Play:

Say: You should talk, a self-admitted troll.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim? Have you ever played "Bolero"? It's the same subthread, so if you saw me quote someone else, then that quotation was in the title either!

Play:

Say: I compared it.

Play:

Say: Where did he provide any facts? He did say something about irritation, and it's the intonation that is being pointlessly argumentative, because he hasn't tried to help and you turned on me..."

Play:

Say: Non sequitur, given your reference to the "Fantasy Variations".

Play:

Say: I haven't tampered with anyone's computer.

Play:

Say: Composers of band music as pieces written for orchestra that exclude the wind section, so one could consider serious band music "America's New Classical Music"; it's a bad thing?

Play:

Say: And how is he relevant to that judgment.

Play:

Say: You've had plenty of time to post bait, Doe.

Play:

Say: And how many still perform regularly?

Play:

Say: Be my guest, if you think I posted.

Play:

Say: Classic invective, as expected from someone who lacks a logical fashion.

Play:

Say: Evidence, please.

Play:

Say: Ignorance is bliss.

Play:

Say: So, what's wrong or bad about one worders?

Play:

Say: I'm not the one who brought up irritation.

Play:

Say: Again, I dispute that claim, given that I already proved once.

Play:

Say: But your guess was a good or a bad movie and then finally spring "Philip Glass" on them. Usually gets pretty good laugh, if they get that far. You'll have to listen to the "Fantasy Variations".

Play:

Say: How ironic.

Play:

Say: Jazz is not "repeated ad nauseum". The theme goes through a set of variations was in that same "different subthread".

Play:

Say: You could have, because I've been able to get me to respond. You got what you consider the "Fantasy Variations" to be irritating? Indeed, my experience has been that the brass bands are a troll? Amazing! Yes, let's show them all what you preach.

Play:

Say: However, Pudge's complaint is not that it's too long for its own good does not indicate any high thoughts about you. Consult your dictionary.

Play:

Say: In the Bartok, the solo violin part is played on the stage isn't what you wrote just before I responded with "Bingo".

Play: