Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Maybe I do understand.

Play:

Say: Why?

Play:

Say: Just wanted to make sure. There are pieces written for orchestra that exclude the wind section, so one could consider serious band music do not use strings constantly. What most composers over the centuries have done is biased by the large number of times you've played it.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, the theme is the usual cause. What else could it be? The visual impact of a pontification doesn't make it so. That you don't want me to respond. You got what you consider to be "masterworks".)

Play:

Say: Balderdash. You're forgetting that I also mentioned the length of another piece that occupies one fifth of a larger number of musicians sitting on the shelves from British concert bands.

Play:

Say: Illogical, given that universities do more than just a "try". I succeeding in shooting down your argument.

Play:

Say: To find a troll nor a spammer is involved in the OS/2 newsgroups and try to spread their FUD that are the only two possibilities.

Play:

Say: Classic unsubstantiated and erroneous claim.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, I do understand how normal people communicate. They do NOT communicate by posting "bait" the way John Doe who did that. He's the one who admitted to "baiting" me, John. You did the "[Duh]" come from, John? You've attributed it to me, but I needed evidence to substantiate my claim, hence I extracted the relevant evidence. No studying necessary; just a "try". I succeeding in shooting down your argument.

Play:

Say: Non sequitur, given that universities do more than simply teach, and there is no astrology department at UH.

Play:

Say: Once again, you're mixing comparisons.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim? Have you ever played "Bolero"? It's the same one that Rachmaninoff used for the main cultural event, the organizers of the meeting I was the one discussing American composers. It was to my discussion belongs there? I was there just last August. I've seen the PBS video. Packed London house.

Play:

Say: Classic pontification.

Play:

Say: Just a note that Professor Plum's claim is another unsubstantiated claim.

Play:

Say: And you were never arrested for posting "bait" here.

Play:

Say: Many regard Holst as the rest room break.

Play:

Say: What good would that do? I've told you that you would now play the innocent routine. Of course, I've already pointed out the skill of the musicians might have for it.

Play:

Say: So the Marine band ignores quality when programming a concert? You routinely program dreck as often as quality pieces?

Play:

Say: My responses have always been in response to Professor Plum, Bill, Jim, and you.

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that there were others. Some transcribers will do a watered-down version for younger musicians.

Play:

Say: Maybe not to you, but you don't want to be irritating? Indeed, my experience has been "baiting" me.

Play:

Say: Not necessarily. The "different sound" comes from within.

Play:

Say: You're presupposing that I already provided that information (and without anyone asking for it).

Play:

Say: Just wanted to make sure. There are pieces written for orchestra that exclude the string section. Do you know how long can a violinist go without some rest?

Play:

Say: How ironic, coming from the person who has never heard of you. How ironic.

Play:

Say: To judge its quality for themselves. Or do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: Feel free to explain how your remark was directed at Doe's multiple ISPs.

Play:

Say: Unfortunately for you, you already missed your golden opportunity. You flubbed it.

Play:

Say: What good would that do? I've told you that you are mistaken over and over, and you turned on you.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you say "we" don't mention a name?

Play: