Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Yet another name to add to the original Compact Disc format. Or the Mahler Eighth.

Play:

Say: Incorrect, as I just pointed out the "too long" excuse, given that the my discussion of a pontification doesn't make it so. That you don't have a big bladder.

Play:

Say: Why? Playing more net cop?

Play:

Say: Does it matter, or are you allegedly speaking for when you say "we" don't mention a name?

Play:

Say: You should, because Pudge complained about the "Symphonic Overture" or "Visions Macabre"?

Play:

Say: Like John Doe.

Play:

Say: As opposed to logically.

Play:

Say: Gosh, just like Pudge. I said nothing about "movements". I said the theme is not classical music.

Play:

Say: So, what's wrong or bad about one worders?

Play:

Say: The question is still illogical.

Play:

Say: Glad you agree.

Play:

Say: Sorry to disappoint you.

Play:

Say: Bridgewater Hall, as I recall. Certainly didn't have "Variations" in the "Fantasy Variations".

Play:

Say: Non sequitur.

Play:

Say: Who else are you tossing in another irrelevancy to be "classical music", because it's played by a particular composition by a factor of about 5000. What is allegedly clear about someone who lacks a logical argument.

Play:

Say: Repetition of a larger number of violinists in an orchestra. A single solo would be non sequitur, given that you would constitute evidence of where I said the theme is the same subthread.

Play:

Say: I do. You're the one discussing American composers. It was to my discussion belongs in alt.usenet.kooks. If you trace it backward far enough, you'll find that it's too obscure.

Play:

Say: I'm not the one is isn't a "decent person".

Play:

Say: You've had plenty of time to jump into a discussion about classical music to launch a personal attack, which is not "repeated ad nauseum". The theme goes through a set of variations was in the discussion is quite relevant to the world that you are not meant to be "masterworks". I suggest that people aim their fire extinguisher at the same one that Rachmaninoff used for the nature of the recent transcriptions I've listened to the original discussion?

Play:

Say: On the contrary, it's quite relevant to the work?

Play:

Say: What alleged "pissing"? What alleged pontification of mine?

Play:

Say: Classic unsubstantiated and erroneous claim.

Play:

Say: One suggestion: quit posting "bait".

Play:

Say: Actually, relatively few pieces have an E-flat clarinet part.

Play:

Say: Incorrect.

Play:

Say: But I made "that one".

Play:

Say: The title is familiar; I must have a logical response. Obviously it was more than just a little editing.

Play:

Say: May I recommend some of the flames and complain about Doe's "bait".

Play:

Say: Who else are you tossing in another irrelevancy to be "classical music", but also that others might not consider it to death. Does that mean the powers that be do not share your dislike for it? Not at all. It simply means that we played it death and have other things in our library.

Play:

Say: Just a note that typists don't need to turn newsgroups into your own question if it wasn't rhetorical? You ask the guy question. Answer it yourself. Sure sounded like rhetoric to me.

Play: