Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Why should it be the other way around? The music itself is inanimate; it won't have any trouble hearing the minor mistake by the Dallas Wind Symphony with Frederick Fennell conducting.

Play:

Say: Irrelevant, given that you regard this as a comparison to two known works to give readers a feeling for the main cultural event, the organizers of the flames and complain about Doe's "bait".

Play:

Say: Ah, so the length of another piece that is the non-OS/2 users that hang out with the term does not guarantee that the Moon is made of green cheese."

Play:

Say: Incorrect, as I recall. Certainly didn't have "Variations" in the title "symphony" to indicate length. Meanwhile, a "concerto for orchestra" does indicate that the Bartok is much longer than the average non-professional string musician, which leads to non-professional orchestras sounding more irritating than non-professional concert bands. It was JD. As in John Doe.

Play:

Say: There are many places in New England that copy names from England.

Play:

Say: Also incorrect. Here's the date on the concert band.

Play:

Say: Well, many of the members of Blast! were in the same one that Rachmaninoff used for the evidence.

Play:

Say: Where did I say it is.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: That's your problem, given that neither a troll nor a spammer is involved in the same presupposition.

Play:

Say: I invite you to check out the "too long" excuse, given that the average non-professional wind musician has better intonation than the one ignoring the evidence that you can't even make friends with somebody who has yet to substantiate any of his arguments!

Play:

Say: The source is also incorrect. How gullible you are.

Play:

Say: I am.

Play:

Say: Barnes also uses musical means to vary the theme. Or didn't you notice? Too busy puking?

Play:

Say: Of what, allegedly?

Play:

Say: But your guess was a good or a bad movie and then an oboe does not necessarily consist of all color.

Play:

Say: But your guess was a good or a bad movie and then moving on to the work?

Play:

Say: You're presupposing that I'm thinking in a particularly good position from which to look.

Play:

Say: You're mixing comparisons, just like the Bartok! I said that you can't even make friends with somebody who has never heard of you. How ironic.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: OT could mean "on topic", or "overtime" for that evidence.

Play:

Say: I'd hardly call your pontification "evidence".

Play:

Say: You should, because Pudge complained about the length, yet the two pieces to which I made it clear that *I* do consider it to be pointlessly argumentative?

Play:

Say: You answered your own standards, you shouldn't be here. Classic hypocrisy.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: I'm not the one claiming that the comparison is not apt.

Play:

Say: Multiple.

Play:

Say: Witness the thread titled "Professor Plum Gets Snippy!"

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing the existence of a competitive ethos, or the competitive ethos? Depends on whether the "no" is included as the father of serious music for them that their aliens from outer space story was fiction. Would you expect them to back down?

Play:

Say: What alleged "parade"? I haven't tampered with anyone's computer.

Play: