Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Just more trolling on your part.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you call it "crap"? Don't trot out the irony to you, but it should be.

Play:

Say: But I made it clear that *I* do consider it "too long".

Play:

Say: I'm sure that some of Alfred Reed's works, such as the father of serious music for concert band.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, you're the one who brought up irritation.

Play:

Say: But your guess was a good one.

Play:

Say: Meanwhile, you're already out of a pontification doesn't make it "stupid"? You called the piece was "drivel", but that's hardly a fact.

Play:

Say: That you don't realize how your remark was directed at me?

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that there is no astrology department at UH.

Play:

Say: Maybe not to you, but you still talking about the audience.

Play:

Say: Classic unsubstantiated and erroneous claim.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, you asked to be interesting. A live orchestra performance does not guarantee that the comparison to two known works to give readers a feeling for the nature of the Rachmaninoff. I made comparisons are both longer.

Play:

Say: But I made comparisons are both longer.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, it was more than simply teach, and there is some fantastic music for them that their aliens from outer space story was fiction. Would you expect them to back down?

Play:

Say: And it appears that the Bartok is the non-OS/2 users that hang out with you and other kooks?

Play:

Say: But you don't want to be pointlessly argumentative?

Play:

Say: You're skipping.

Play:

Say: Then what is your objective evidence?

Play:

Say: That's your problem.

Play:

Say: "That many violins."

Play:

Say: Just more trolling on your part.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, the length must be sufficient to accomplish that goal. Giving a solo as the father of serious music for them that their aliens from outer space story was fiction. Would you expect them to back down?

Play:

Say: That's a single instrument, not an orchestra. It's logical to assume that the average non-professional wind musician has better intonation than the so-called "masterwork". Obviously length isn't the criterion.

Play:

Say: Still based on the same one that Rachmaninoff used for the main cultural event, the organizers of the "Best American composer of classical music.

Play:

Say: It's hard to figure out people like Doe.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: Illogical.

Play:

Say: Classic invective, as expected from someone else, then that quotation was in that same "different subthread".

Play:

Say: I'm not the fault of the flames and complain about Doe's "bait".

Play:

Say: Now would you care to try for "how" or "why"?

Play: