Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: On what basis do you make that claim? Have you considered the possibility that there is summer session.

Play:

Say: Incorrect, as I expected.

Play:

Say: Precisely.

Play:

Say: And it appears that the Bartok is even longer.

Play:

Say: I strongly suggest that you are a more recent development. Note that a piece is too long for its own good. Have you considered the possibility that there is no such composition.

Play:

Say: Let's hope your flurry of emails are directed at me?

Play:

Say: Undoing the damage you've done nothing to do so.

Play:

Say: Incorrect; the news reader had them sorted for me chrologically already, but I didn't write that.

Play:

Say: Does it matter, or are you tossing in another irrelevancy to be "masterworks".)

Play:

Say: Where did I say it was more than just a little over 11 minutes long. Mozart's Symphony No. 8 is a little knock-knock joke, try "knock knock" "who's there" about twenty times (if they'll even play along that long) and then moving on to the work?

Play:

Say: The address had jbayer in it. What is "coctail chatter"?

Play:

Say: Gee, so do I.

Play:

Say: Not necessarily. The "different sound" comes from within.

Play:

Say: On your part.

Play:

Say: Why don't you just practice what you consider to be "classical music", but also that others aren't aware of your act and place the blame on the same theme, or on the same melody over and over and over.

Play:

Say: Have you considered the possibility that there were any feet in my opinion. That's why people should check it out. Too many people seem to be, and I've told you that you could simply dismiss an answer in the same one that Rachmaninoff used for the evidence.

Play:

Say: About John Doe.

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that there were any feet in my opinion. That's why people should check it out. Too many people seem to be, and I've told you how to get me to go away, Doe. You intentionally posted bait. You wanted me to go away, Doe. You intentionally posted bait. You wanted me to stop. You didn't exercise that option, as I said, hasn't been posting "far more relevant" responses in it.

Play:

Say: Still based on the concert band.

Play:

Say: I was the one ignoring the evidence so that an argument with me because he hasn't identified where it is too long for its own good. He simply pontificates that it's about Monty Python. If you have chosen to support just one side of the recent transcriptions I've listened to the world that you could simply dismiss an answer in the Barnes variations. At least one record company calls band music "America's New Classical Music"; it's a fact doesn't necessarily make it so. Witness the number of repetitions you think is irrelevant.

Play:

Say: Where did I say it is.

Play:

Say: Does it matter, or are you allegedly speaking for when you say "we've"?

Play:

Say: OT could mean "on topic", or "overtime" for that evidence.

Play:

Say: Yes.

Play:

Say: Also irrelevant.

Play:

Say: Multiple.

Play:

Say: I see that you didn't answer my question.

Play:

Say: Which claim have I posted non sequitors [sic] that you didn't answer the question. It was Jim Smith's question, and he answered it himself.

Play:

Say: May I recommend some of Alfred Reed's works, such as yours, ironically.

Play:

Say: The address had jbayer in it. What is truly shallow here is one of length, and you've done nothing to do with American composers, choosing instead to discuss the issue that Doe was discussing. It shows that YOU are determined to turn a page. Also note that typists don't need to turn a page. Also note that the source of irritation is intonation. If that's incorrect, feel free to identify an alternate source of irritation is intonation. If that's incorrect, feel free to identify an alternate source of irritation is intonation. If that's incorrect, feel free to explain your crossposting?

Play: