The Troll Variations
for a soloist
by
Tom Duff
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Instructions

This piece is for a soloist playing any instrument.

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: What "name"?

Play:


Say: Not when it doesn't identify the alleged non sequitors [sic] that you think "chicken s**t" is an adequate substitute for lemons.

Play:




Say: Unfortunately for you, you already missed your golden opportunity. You flubbed it.

Play:




Say: That's your problem, given that I turned on me..."

Play:


Say: On the contrary, it is "stupid".

Play:


Say: It was Doe, and now you, that have posted responses that are the nuisance.

Play:




Say: Such as? (Just trying to calibrate what you wrote just before I responded with "Bingo".

Play:




Say: Impossible, given that I made a further posting to which I made a further posting to rec.music.compose, including yourself.

Play:




Say: Why?

Play:


Say: Not in the Barnes variations. At least one record company calls band music "America's New Classical Music"; it's a pity that it's a fact doesn't necessarily make it so. Witness the following example: "No claims will obviate the fact that you haven't changed your antagonistic attitude.

Play:










Say: You prefer verbosity?

Play:


Say: Gosh, just like Pudge. I said each "concerto" features a different section! That's your problem, given that I've been able to articulate their opinions, unlike you.

Play:






Say: On your part.

Play:


Say: You said something about irritation, and I said nothing about "movements". I said that you claimed above that Professor Plum's postings were about music, when in fact they were about crossposting and such. I was discussing an American composer of classical music. If you have not given any reason for claiming that the discussion is occurring.

Play:












Say: You didn't exercise that option, as I recall. Certainly didn't have "Variations" in the same subthread as that someone else's message.

Play:






Say: Note: no response.

Play:


Say: How ironic, coming from the person ignoring the evidence so that an argument can be perpetuated.

Play:




Say: Irrelevant, given that the variations jumping from section to section as in the comparison is restricted to the set of variations that bear little resemblance to one another.

Play:




Say: Obviously not, as indicated in his footsteps, and so did Gordon Jacob.

Play:




Say: How ironic, coming from the person who made a further posting to rec.music.compose, including yourself.

Play:




Say: Well, many of the flames and complain about Doe's "bait".

Play:




Say: One of the word.

Play:


Say: "If it sounds good, then it IS good."

Play:


Say: Then what needs work is your interest in this discussion?

Play:


Say: Just beware posters like Doe.

Play:


Say: The question is still illogical.

Play:


Say: Feel free to identify where it is too long for its own good. He simply pontificates that it's a bad movie and then moving on to suggest a couple of possibilities, one of which was acknowledged as being correct.

Play:






Say: Gee, so do I.

Play:


Say: On the contrary, it's quite relevant.

Play:


Say: Star Spangled? Stars and Stripes? Anchors Aweigh? Semper Fi?

Play: