The Troll Variations

The Troll Variations for a soloist by Tom Duff Reload for a new version!

Instructions

This piece is for a soloist playing any instrument.

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: On the contrary, the length of the meeting I was responding.

Play:

Say: Where did he provide any facts? He did say something about irritation, and it's the intonation that is based on the same kind of articles does Jim write?

Play:

Say: What alleged "irritability"? I was responding.

Play:

Say: How so, given that I never claimed that Rach's is the same forces involved, though usually in greater numbers, the most likely difference being saxophones.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: Non sequitur.

Play:

Say: How so, given that the Moon is made of green cheese."

Play:

Say: Yet another unsubstantiated claim.

Play:

Say: How ironic.

Play:

Say: Missed too much of it by the solo jumps from soloist to solist, much in the case of the time.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: Just because one person can claim that it's too long.

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that I'm a "24/7 jackass". Ironically, you're the one you heard?

Play:

Say: Monty Python, anyone?

Play:

Say: Just wanted to make sure. There are multiple people with that name here.

Play:

Say: Then what needs work is your objective evidence?

Play:

Say: The Bartok was restricted to how the variation jumps from soloist to soloist or section to section, just as in the title either!

Play:

Say: If the previous material was irrelevant, then why did you claim that it's not long enough, therefore whatever direction you're trying to take this discussion is occurring.

Play:

Say: Different theme; the Rachmaninoff "Rhapsody", and not as long as the Bartok is even longer.

Play:

Say: Do you instantly go into "dislike mode" whenever an orchestra plays a section of music is the "Fantasy Variations" sometime, or Reed's "Armenian Dances", or Schmitt's "Dionysiaques". At least one record company calls band music do not share your dislike for it? Not at all. It simply means that we played it to death. Does that mean the powers that be now have a dislike for it? Not at all. It simply means that we played it to be perpetrated on the same subthread as that someone else's message.

Play: