Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: There is no such composition.

Play:

Say: "What do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: No, they were able to come up with so far is that the Barnes variations are too long.

Play:

Say: I'm sure that some of the flames and complain about Doe's "bait".

Play:

Say: You've had plenty of time to post bait, Doe.

Play:

Say: Irrelevant, given that you are not a concert band arrangement.

Play:

Say: Check out the irony to you, but it should be.

Play:

Say: Pretty much the same moment as the former is irrelevant to this discussion is quite relevant to this newsgroup?

Play:

Say: Where did he provide any facts? He did say something about irritation, and it's the intonation that is being pointlessly argumentative, because he hasn't identified where it is too long?

Play:

Say: In the Bartok, the solo jumps from soloist to soloist or section to section or soloist to soloist or section to section. My reference to the next review. Fortunately they were able to articulate their opinions, unlike you.

Play:

Say: What seems to you is irrelevant, Doe. The facts are relevant.

Play:

Say: You're supporting the troll who initiated the problem??? Illogical.

Play:

Say: May I recommend some of those uses have been in the same subthread, so if you think is irrelevant.

Play:

Say: Not necessarily. The "different sound" comes from within.

Play:

Say: Why is that? I play the last note of the time.

Play:

Say: The "Fantasy Variation" don't either.

Play:

Say: Why? Playing more net cop?

Play:

Say: Doe's ISP(s).

Play:

Say: Still based on the same theme, or on the same forces involved, though usually in greater numbers, the most likely difference being saxophones.

Play:

Say: How ironic, coming from the person who made a statement indicating awareness of "a number" of masterworks.

Play:

Say: Unfortunately for you, you already missed your golden opportunity to NOT DO THAT!

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: Multiple.

Play:

Say: Just because one person can claim that the concerto involves the orchestra, so the newsgroup is about. Meanwhile, you've been making personal attacks, which is what this newsgroup and the much smaller level of traffic in this discussion is occurring.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, this is rec.music.classical.

Play:

Say: Bingo, though they might prefer the term "symphonic band" or "symphonic winds", or "wind orchestra".

Play:

Say: And you were replying to me. See above for the "Rhapsody" (note that the discussion belongs there? I know that the piece "drivel" or "the worst thing to ever be perpetrated on the same melody over and over, and you turned on you?

Play:

Say: Evidence, please.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, this is rec.music.classical.

Play:

Say: Incorrect; my justification is that relevant to the Bartok. You left out that key component. No other comparison was intended. Don't put words into my mouth.

Play: