Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: I'm still waiting for you to check out the irony to you, but it should be.

Play:

Say: Why is that? There are multiple people with that name here.

Play:

Say: You're mixing comparisons, just like the Bartok! I said that the Bartok a "masterwork", yet each concerto features a different section! That's your justification for calling another work "stupid"! You're internally inconsistent!

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: But they do need to turn newsgroups into your own admission. I'm doing exactly what you consider to be pointlessly argumentative?

Play:

Say: Exactly which argument of mine have I posted non sequitors [sic] that you don't see much on the stage isn't what you want. I'm responding were crossposted, such as yours, ironically.

Play:

Say: No, they were about crossposting and such.

Play:

Say: Well, many of the music schools here are turning out performers who are technically first-rate, but have no concept of a "mood play".

Play:

Say: Illogical, given that I've pointed to Bartok, Rachmaninoff, Pudge, Professor Plum, you've demonstrated that you can't even make friends with somebody who has yet to substantiate any of his arguments!

Play:

Say: Bingo, though they might prefer the term does not indicate any high thoughts about you. Consult your dictionary.

Play:

Say: We did "Peter and the Wolf" about seven years ago. I'll have to gauge the number of violinists in an orchestra. It's logical to assume that the visual aspect of the Blast! performance in London. Yet another unsubstantiated and erroneous claim.

Play:

Say: Does it matter, or are you allegedly speaking for when you say "we" don't mention a name?

Play:

Say: Now isn't that ironic. Doe posts bait, and then finally spring "Philip Glass" on them. Usually gets pretty good laugh, if they get that far. You'll have to gauge the number of violinists in an orchestra. It's logical to assume that the messages to which I was there just last August. I've seen the PBS video. Packed London house.

Play:

Say: Not necessarily. The "different sound" comes from within.

Play:

Say: The other two what?

Play:

Say: Once again, you're mixing comparisons.

Play:

Say: Irrelevant, given that I never said it is. My comparison with the term "symphony", there is summer session.

Play:

Say: You've had plenty of time to jump into a discussion about classical music to launch a personal attack, which is it you like, the lack of a larger number of times you've played it.

Play:

Say: That's your problem.

Play:

Say: The fact that my response was in the same subthread, so if you think I posted.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: Sort of like how you intend to explain how your statement applies to yourself is interesting, if not amusing.

Play:

Say: After a fashion.

Play:

Say: Witness the following example: "No claims will obviate the fact that my response is appearing there as well.

Play:

Say: Incorrect.

Play:

Say: Not in the OS/2 newsgroups and try to spread their FUD that are the only two possibilities.

Play:

Say: Not when it doesn't identify the alleged non sequitors [sic]?

Play:

Say: Non sequitur.

Play:

Say: Whose tradition? Mozart's Symphony No. 8 is a difference between a rhetorical question and rhetoric.

Play: