The Troll Variations
for a soloist
by
Tom Duff
Reload for a new version!

Instructions

This piece is for a soloist playing any instrument.

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: So, what's wrong or bad about one worders?

Play:


Say: On what basis do you really expect everyone to simply trust your questionable judgment?

Play:




Say: Threats are irrelevant. Hypocrites don't get very far.

Play:




Say: The key word here is "if".

Play:


Say: Missed too much of it during the rest of the original discussion?

Play:


Say: Just because one person can claim that I was discussing involving American composers, thus it is too long for its own good. In other words, I have eliminated the possibility that there is some fantastic music for them that their aliens from outer space story was fiction. Would you expect them to back down?

Play:










Say: Note: no response.

Play:


Say: Readers take note: Carter is someone who lacks a logical response. Obviously it was "good"?

Play:




Say: And I'd like to learn more about your opinion. But so far, all I've been posting here since a few years ago.

Play:




Say: Note: no response.

Play:


Say: In case it makes a difference, both Sparke and Hart were born in England.

Play:




Say: What difference would it make whether I'm a composer or not?

Play:


Say: How ironic, coming from the person who has never heard of you. How ironic.

Play:


Say: You're presupposing that I'm thinking in a logical fashion.

Play:


Say: Many times. Have you?

Play:


Say: Why? Barnes doesn't use the same subthread as that someone else's message.

Play:




Say: And you went on to suggest a couple of possibilities, one of them as correct, thus I had already read the message from someone "loonie" enough to not recognize what a "loonie" is.

Play:






Say: That's also your problem.

Play:


Say: Witness the number of musicians on the stage?

Play:


Say: Who they are is different from what they do.

Play:


Say: You're skipping.

Play:


Say: Yes.

Play:


Say: Incorrect.

Play:


Say: Doe's ISP(s).

Play:


Say: Monty Python, anyone?

Play:


Say: Where's Wilma?

Play:


Say: Incorrect, as I just told you: to calibrate what you preach.

Play:




Say: Incorrect.

Play:


Say: I haven't suggested that everyone here listen.

Play:


Say: Yet another unsubstantiated and erroneous claim.

Play: