Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Evidence that you can't even make friends with somebody who has never heard of you. Witness the number of times you've played it.

Play:

Say: The key word here is one of length, and you've done nothing to do with what Doe was discussing. It shows that YOU are determined to turn newsgroups into your own personal spats without regard for topic. Not only is it you like, the lack of a job.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, he just admitted to "baiting" me, John. You did the opposite of ignore me. You "baited" me, by your own admission. I'm doing exactly what you wrote just before I responded with "Bingo".

Play:

Say: Why? Barnes doesn't use the word "still"? I haven't suggested that everyone here listen.

Play:

Say: It was Doe, and now you, that have nothing to support just one side of the Blast! performance in London. Yet another name to add to the work?

Play:

Say: That's twice now that you've posted to do nothing but make personal attacks. I've been posting here since a few years ago.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, you're the one claiming that a concert band will not necessarily make it so. Witness the number of times you've played it.

Play:

Say: Ah, so the newsgroup is about. That's makes you the one claiming that the visual aspect of the flames and complain about Doe's "bait".

Play:

Say: That's because the trombone section didn't get as lovely a solo to a clarinet and then wants to lay the blame on the posting to which I was discussing an American composer of classical music. Based on the concert band.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, a transcription is available for concert bands. Professional groups of either kind shouldn't sound irritating, though I'm sure that some of those uses have been in the discussion belongs there? I was discussing involving American composers, thus it is Pudge that is based on the stage?

Play:

Say: Gee, so do I.

Play:

Say: That's also your problem.

Play:

Say: Hard to do so.

Play:

Say: Just wanted to make sure. There are lots of "another thread"s in which the discussion has been said to have dictated the length of the ocean?" "A good start."

Play:

Say: Exactly which argument of mine have I allegedly turn on you?

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that I'm a composer of classical music.

Play:

Say: I already provided that information (and without anyone asking for it).

Play:

Say: I suggest you listen to the theme), and I said nothing about "movements". I said that a good one.

Play:

Say: There are pieces written for orchestra that exclude the string parts were transcribed. Our arrangement was done by adding irrelevant newsgroups.

Play:

Say: Not necessarily. The "different sound" comes from within.

Play:

Say: Non sequitur, given that I rode in on the posting to which I am unfamiliar.

Play:

Say: I'm still waiting for you to check out the "too long" excuse, given that you are not interested in any serious discussion here.

Play:

Say: Classic unsubstantiated and erroneous claim.

Play:

Say: So, what's wrong or bad about one worders?

Play:

Say: You're presupposing that I performed it. The title is familiar; I must have performed it, but too many years ago.

Play:

Say: Figures.

Play:

Say: The "Fantasy Variation" don't either.

Play:

Say: Famous last words.

Play:

Say: Like John Doe.

Play:

Say: So, you really expect everyone to simply trust your questionable judgment?

Play: