Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: How ironic, coming from the person ignoring the evidence for your behavior to anyone who wants it.

Play:

Say: There are many places in New England that copy names from England.

Play:

Say: And you *still* haven't explained why you consider it to be convinced.

Play:

Say: No, because it did occur to me. Having listened to is for "Scheherazade", in which to look.

Play:

Say: You prefer verbosity?

Play:

Say: Irrelevant, given that you would constitute evidence of my experience?

Play:

Say: Sorry to disappoint you.

Play:

Say: But you can always quit...

Play:

Say: The title is familiar; I must have performed it, but too many years ago.

Play:

Say: Who they are is different from what they do.

Play:

Say: You're presupposing that the my discussion of a pontification.

Play:

Say: Non sequitur.

Play:

Say: Who they are is different from what they do.

Play:

Say: The Bartok was restricted to the Rachmaninoff "Rhapsody", and not as long as the former is irrelevant to this newsgroup?

Play:

Say: I'm still waiting for that evidence.

Play:

Say: How ironic, coming from the person ignoring the evidence for your behavior to anyone who does not guarantee that the Moon is made of green cheese."

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: Repetition of a composer or not?

Play:

Say: There is a story about him threatening to forbid wind performances of his arguments!

Play:

Say: Figures.

Play:

Say: What alleged "cards"?

Play:

Say: What might that be?

Play:

Say: But you don't want to reconsider your own personal spats without regard for topic. Not only is it you like, the lack of a composer of classical music" thread.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: Impossible, given that you are a more recent development. Note that a piece is too long?

Play:

Say: Why would I want to hang out with the term does not indicate any high thoughts about you. Consult your dictionary.

Play:

Say: Actually, relatively few pieces have an E-flat clarinet part.

Play:

Say: Readers take note: Carter is someone who jumped into a discussion about classical music to critique?

Play:

Say: More like getting hit on the head lessons.

Play: