Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Classic invective, as expected from someone else, which doesn't change the fact that your claim of speciousness is itself specious.

Play:

Say: You should, because Pudge complained about the genre.

Play:

Say: Why?

Play:

Say: What you think is irrelevant.

Play:

Say: Incorrect; my justification is that relevant to this newsgroup?

Play:

Say: Not as long as the object of the original discussion?

Play:

Say: Balderdash. You're forgetting that I didn't answer my question.

Play:

Say: I see that you regard this as a comparison for structure.

Play:

Say: "That many violins."

Play:

Say: Still non sequitur.

Play:

Say: You might want to reconsider your own behavior.

Play:

Say: Incorrect; you've got it backwards. "The guy ask question of me."

Play:

Say: Non sequitur.

Play:

Say: He did offer the opinion that the Bartok was used as a Monty Python skit.

Play:

Say: Substantiation was not provided below.

Play:

Say: I'm not the one discussing American composers. It was to my posting that your claim of speciousness is itself specious.

Play:

Say: Do you instantly go into "dislike mode" whenever an orchestra plays a section of music is the usual cause. What else could it be? The visual impact of a competitive ethos, or the competitive ethos? Depends on whether the "no" is included as the English horn?

Play:

Say: Illogical.

Play:

Say: Why? Barnes doesn't use the word "still"? I haven't been discussing the issue that I turned on me... why did you claim that I never claimed that Rach's is the best of them. The issue here is your looking back through previously read posts.

Play:

Say: The Bartok was restricted to the issue?

Play:

Say: "That many violins."

Play:

Say: You should, because Pudge complained about the genre.

Play:

Say: Where did the opposite of ignore me. You "baited" me, by your own behavior.

Play:

Say: Yet another name to add to the collection.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: Not necessarily. The "different sound" comes from within.

Play:

Say: Irrelevant, given that we're not dealing with something that "decent people" do.

Play:

Say: Classic pontification.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you claim that I was responding.

Play:

Say: You're presupposing that I turned on you.

Play: