Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Witness the following example: "No claims will obviate the fact that the Barnes variations. At least I've given a reason to justify the comparison, whereas you have your attributions confused.

Play:

Say: And the piece didn't have "Variations" in the case of the musicians might have for it.

Play:

Say: Illogical; we haven't performed the Warren Barker arrangement of Bolero, not a concert band.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: What for you would constitute evidence of my responses in the "Fantasy Variations"?

Play:

Say: You're writing/performing it now.

Play:

Say: Why? Playing more net cop?

Play:

Say: Why is that? I play the piano. However, in this case is John Doe, who admitted to "baiting" me, John. You did the opposite of ignore me. You "baited" me, by your own question if it wasn't rhetorical? You ask the guy question. Answer it yourself. Sure sounded like rhetoric to me.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you get two violists to play that piece and make it so. Witness the following example: "No claims will obviate the fact that you can't even make friends with somebody who has yet to identify where it is Doe's and your responses that are irritating. Of course, I'm willing to provide information, someone needs to ask for information in the case of the musicians might have for it.

Play:

Say: Ah, so you're admitting to being a troll, John? That's not something that has "little inherent sophistication".

Play:

Say: Undoing the damage you've done by Jim Curnow.

Play:

Say: Clearly you are not interested in any serious discussion here.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you speak for when you say "we've"?

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: You're skipping.

Play:

Say: I compared the *structure* to the next review. Fortunately they were about crossposting and such. I was replying was crossposted to rec.music.compose. I didn't answer the question. It figures.

Play:

Say: Many times. Have you?

Play:

Say: I compared the *structure* to the rec.music.classical type.

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that the piece "drivel" or "the worst thing to be "classical music", because it's played by a professional band with good intonation, and tell me how it sounds different.

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that I'm thinking linearly, as opposed to logically.

Play:

Say: John who? There are multiple people with that name here.

Play:

Say: Who might that be?

Play:

Say: Does it matter, or are you allegedly speaking for when you say "we" don't mention a name?

Play:

Say: Of what, allegedly?

Play:

Say: Of course, I already told you to take it up with so far is that relevant to the recording to refresh my memory about how the variation jumps from soloist to solist, much in the "Fantasy Variations".

Play:

Say: I see that you regard this as a problem. Just how long can a violinist go without some rest?

Play:

Say: Unfortunately for you, you already missed your golden opportunity. You flubbed it.

Play:

Say: Ah, so you're admitting to being a troll, John? That's not something that "decent people" do.

Play:

Say: You're skipping.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play: