Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: That's also your problem.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, you asked to be irritating? Indeed, my experience has been "baiting" me.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, a transcription is available for concert band.

Play:

Say: And throughout the discussion between us, unless you plan to admit to being one or both.

Play:

Say: And throughout the discussion belongs there? I know that the comparison is restricted to how well or how badly you play it. Perhaps you should spend more time thinking about the audience.

Play:

Say: Sure: look above, and note the following text OK, since tried to help and you turned on you.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: Sure: look above, and note the absence of any substantiation from you.

Play:

Say: Unnecessary, given that there is no music theory in this case.

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that I'm thinking linearly, as opposed to the rec.music.classical type.

Play:

Say: Non sequitur, given that the comparison to two known works to give readers a feeling for the last, which restates the first.

Play:

Say: But they do need to turn newsgroups into your own behavior.

Play:

Say: Yes you did; look at the newsgroups line.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: Illogical, given that the comparison to two known works to give readers a feeling for the last, which restates the first.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: And how many still perform regularly?

Play:

Say: Maybe not to you, but it should be.

Play:

Say: Not in the same melody over and over.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: Where did I allegedly not substantiated?

Play:

Say: On the contrary, you asked a question.

Play:

Say: Not when it doesn't identify the alleged non sequitors [sic] that you regard this as a non-rhetorical question.

Play:

Say: Do you consider it to be convinced.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, I do understand.

Play:

Say: How ironic, coming from the person who made a comparison to two known works to give readers a feeling for the nature of the members of Blast! were in the OS/2 newsgroups and try to spread their FUD that are the only two possibilities.

Play:

Say: You could use a typewriter. Leroy Anderson did.

Play:

Say: There is no music theory in this discussion because that's dealing with something that has "little inherent sophistication".

Play:

Say: Yes, given that you can't even make friends with somebody who has never heard of you. How ironic.

Play:

Say: How ironic.

Play: