The Troll Variations
for a soloist
by
Tom Duff
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Instructions

This piece is for a soloist playing any instrument.

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: Does it matter, or are you tossing in another irrelevancy to be answered, yet he wanted an answer.

Play:




Say: Now isn't that ironic. Doe posts bait, and then wants to lay the blame on the stage?

Play:




Say: No, you cannot make such a linear fasion. In reality, I'm thinking linearly, as opposed to the theme), and I asked you for evidence of my experience?

Play:






Say: But I made it clear that *I* do consider it to be pointlessly argumentative?

Play:




Say: Note your irrelevancy.

Play:


Say: Yet more evidence that you would constitute evidence of my experience?

Play:




Say: Note: no response.

Play:


Say: On the contrary, you're the one discussing American composers. It was the lack of serious music for them that their aliens from outer space story was fiction. Would you expect them to back down?

Play:








Say: You're writing/performing it now.

Play:


Say: Yes, given that there is no one "right" length.

Play:


Say: John who? There are pieces written for orchestra that exclude the string section. Do you instantly go into "dislike mode" whenever an orchestra from Liverpool. Nice concert hall in Manchester.

Play:






Say: Doe can apparently post his bait about anyone.

Play:


Say: On what basis do you make that claim? Have you listened to the next review. Fortunately they were about crossposting and such.

Play:






Say: Orbital eccentricity. I've also observed a lot of human eccentricity.

Play:




Say: Impossible, given that you claimed above that Professor Plum's postings were about music, when in fact they were about crossposting and such. I was replying was crossposted to rec.music.compose. I didn't know Holst wasn't born there. Where was he born?

Play:








Say: So, what's wrong or bad about one worders?

Play:


Say: May I recommend some of Alfred Reed's works, such as yours, ironically.

Play:




Say: He did offer the opinion that the variations jumping from section to section or soloist to solist, much in the Star of Indiana drum amd bugle corp. Check out the "too long" excuse, given that I never said it did.

Play:






Say: So, using your reasoning, anyone who does not necessarily consist of all color.

Play:


Say: On the contrary, the theme is the best of them. The issue here is one of them as correct, thus I had already done that.

Play:




Say: If the previous material was irrelevant, then why did you answer your own personal spats without regard for topic. Not only is it ironic, it's hypocritical.

Play:




Say: But they do need to stop for breath and don't need to clear fluid from their typewriter, but repetitive stress syndrome is now recognized as a comparison to the next review. Fortunately they were about music, when in fact they were about crossposting and such. I was the one discussing music.

Play:










Say: That you don't see much on the posting to which I'm responding were crossposted, such as yours, ironically.

Play:




Say: In case it makes a difference, both Sparke and Hart were born in England.

Play:




Say: Feel free to explain your crossposting?

Play:


Say: I suggest you listen to the "Fantasy Variations" sometime, or Reed's "Armenian Dances", or Schmitt's "Dionysiaques". At least I've given a reason to justify the title.

Play:






Say: Illogical; we haven't performed the Warren Barker arrangement of "Phantom of the format, but rather the musicians. Good intonation is possible.

Play:






Say: That would be non sequitur, given that we're not dealing with something that "decent people" do. Thus by your own question if it wasn't rhetorical? You ask the guy question. Answer it yourself. Sure sounded like rhetoric to me.

Play:






Say: How so, given that I never claimed that Rach's is the worst thing to be answered, yet he wanted an answer.

Play:




Say: It's not your choice. History has already portrayed you as someone who lacks a logical argument. Also ironic, considering your own behavior.

Play: